(highlight = transitions, pointing terms, key terms, repetitions)

Reflection: After reading these 2 connecting paragraphs through the chapter 8 They Say/ I Say lens, I realize that my writing is heavily dependent on repeating terms. Specifically, “explore,” “meaningful,” “impacts”, “nature,” and “relationships,” are the words most repeated. I know that when I am writing, I try to choose my words carefully so that my message can be conveyed as accurately as possible to my audience. my transitions are the weakest points in my essay. The final 2 lines of my 2nd paragraph is an example area where I did not use a proper transition, or arguably, not a transition at all. I think for these lines I would rephrase, ” While it is true that many relationships are founded in person, it does not necessarily rule out the other ways in which humans can develop intense connections. There is an incredible story written by Adrian Chen that tells the story of miraculous change inspired by the virtual connection that social media enables.” to say,

“While it is true that many personal relationships are founded in person, those relationships don’t discredit the other ways in which humans can develop intense connections; specifically, social media. There are many stories that provide a basis for the undeniable intimacy and connection that virtual relationships inspire. One of those stories, written by Adrian Chen, tells the story of miraculous change in an individual inspired by the virtual connection that social media enables.”

The purple text shows where I edited my initial sentence by adding a stronger transition, as well as including my repeating terms and adding more pointing terms that were cautiously used.

Understanding the future impacts that social media will have on our upcoming generations is imponderable. Our society has not yet seen a grown generation who used social media in their childhood development years, so we can’t be sure what the effects will be. What has been acknowledged, is the power of social media. “The Limits of Friendship,” by journalist Maria Konnikova and former New Yorker writer Adrian Chen’s “Unfollow” explore the concept of social media in relation to personal relationships, specifically, the negative and positive of virtual communication. Social media is a force that has enabled a future of meaningful connections among people of widely diverse backgrounds, cultures, and religions. Social media is not a roadblock to creating profound relationships, it’s a thruway.

In “The Limits of Friendship,” writer Maria Konnikova explores the nature of meaningful human relationships, and discusses the impacts that social media might have on our ability to develop connection. The essence of Konnikova’s argument is, “The time we invest in superficial relationships comes at the expense of more profound ones.” (Konnikova 4). The point that she is making with this statement is that because virtual relationships are not as physically intimate as in person ones, they are somehow less meaningful. The nature of virtual relationships prove otherwise. When chatting online for the first time, there’s a degree of anonymity that is involved. Unlike face-to-face communication, there is less tension and danger of rejection or embarrassment.  It is easier to express your “true self” online when there is no immediate fear. Anonymity empowers those who are insecure to go beyond their comfort levels, and shy people especially can surpass their fears. With the power of social media, one is free to be authentic. Authenticity and honesty lead to intimacy, and virtual relationships are no exception. Some readers may challenge my view by insisting that their most vital relationships were cultivated in the real world. While it is true that many relationships are founded in person, it does not necessarily rule out the other ways in which humans can develop intense connections. There is an incredible story written by Adrian Chen that tells the story of miraculous change inspired by the virtual connection that social media enables.